2016 have been a year with ups and downs.

2016 were the year where I got accepted to the education that I have always wanted. I was finally ready to start having a “normal” life, just like my friends. I was in a good place and I wasn’t no longer scared to go outside or be alone – not as much as I used to be. I was ready, I was happy.

But three days before I had to start my education, something terrible happened. I was assaulted. A man grabbed my arm and hold me and tried to drag me into the woods  in the middle of the night. I was on my way home from my boyfriend and i remember him asking me “Do you want me to follow you home? I can if you want me to.” But I told him I would be fine. But I was wrong.

I ended up talking to the police and my family for hours. I didn’t close my eyes that night and I stopped talking to people I would normally talk to. I couldn’t stop crying and I didn’t wanted to do anything but lay in my bed all days. I couldn’t stop showering, because I felt his hands all over me, even weeks after it happened.

I couldn’t start on the education I always have been dreaming about. I was at home for a month or two, doing absolutely nothing. But I thought I was ok again, so I got into another school, a school I went to in 2015. But I wasn’t ok. I got “kicked out”. I wasn’t ready and they couldn’t help me.

So now I’m back where I started. Doing nothing, scared, depressed, anxious etc.

But 2016 were also the year where I met my boyfriend, Nicolai. Or that’s kind of a lie- we actually met in 2015, but we started talking in 2016. We started as friends – we were together a lot and we actually liked each other, but didn’t know what the other person thought, so we didn’t say anything.

But now we have been together for 7 months January 1st. I’m so lucky to have him as a part of my life and he is willing to to what ever he can to make me feel good.

He knows me more than anybody else. And he’ll do everything to make me smile and make me feel safe. I’m so thankful for having him in my life.

2016 were the year when I stopped talking to a girl that I really like and really care about. A friend that I’m so thankful to have. But we kind of got in to a fight for some stupid reasons and didn’t talked for months. But I contacted her and we decided to try and start over. And now we’re talking like we never stopped. I’m so happy to have her back.

2016 have also been the year with a lot of laughs and smiles. A lot of memories that I’ll never forget. Long car journeys with my dad and brother, funny moments with my mom, lots of games and singing with my little sister.

I’m still depressed and I still have anxiety. And yes, I also have PTSD. And that’s something that ruins a lot, but I think everything has happened or is happening for a reason, and I might not be happy all the time – but when I do, I really enjoy it and appreciate it.

I don’t know what’s going to happen in 2017 and of someone gave me the chance to find out, I wouldn’t take it. Even if I could find out if I’m going to feel better, I wouldn’t take it. There is a reason for everything, and that’s not something we should change – if you know what I mean.

2017 – I can’t wait to see what you are going to bring me.

Happy New Years!

// Sarah Katrine

Instagram – sarahkatrinekat

Mail – sarahkatblog@gmail.com

So Christmas is over and you can see my Christmas Eve right here
Christmas Vlog 2016

// Sarah Katrine

Instagram – Sarahkatrinekat
Mail – sarahkatblog@gmail.com

Kære mormor
Jeg håber, at du har det godt.
Nu er det endnu en gang tid til, at vi skal holde jul uden dig.
Ricky og mor har handlet ind. De knokler for, at vi alle får en fantastisk jul.
Mor står i køkkenet og laver mad hele dagen. Du har lært hende en masse og jeg er ikke i tvivl om, at hun står der og tænker på dig. Står og tænker på, hvor rart det ville være hvis du kunne være her sammen med os og hvor rart det kunne være hvis du sad ved julebordet sammen med os – og kunne smage alt den lækre mad.
Mor har fortalt meget om dig til, Ricky og jeg er sikker på, at Ricky ville ønske at du kunne være her.
Både for vores skyld, men også for hans – jeg er sikker på, at I ville elske hinanden.
Din datter har fundet en mand som elsker hende og hendes børn. Han passer på hende og gør alt hvad han kan for at vi har det godt.
Far kommer igen i år og holder jul med os. Han snakker tit om dig og moster. Han har fortalt mange historier om ting I har snakket om og ting som I har lavet. Og jeg ved, at han savner dig utrolig meget. Du betød noget helt særligt for ham.
Frederik og jeg savner dig helt utrolig meget. Frederik snakker ikke meget om dig, men jeg ved at han mangler dig.
Det gør vi alle.
Tingene kan være hårde nogen gange, men alt skal nok gå. Vi finder altid en løsning.
Og jeg håber, at når du kigger ned på os, kan du se hvor meget vi prøver. At du er stolt af os. Jeg må stoppe nu, men vi snakkes nok ved en dag. Indtil da så må du have det godt og passe på dig selv.
Jeg elsker dig og ved, at du elsker mig – ville dog ønske, at du kunne sige der bare én gang mere.
Vi ses en dag, mormor.

Hilsen Sarah.

PS. Når vi danser om træet senere og jeg kigger op på træets top og ser stjernen skal du vide, at det er dig jeg tænker på.

// Sarah Katrine
Instagram – Sarahkatrinekat
Mail – Sarahkatblog@gmail.com

“Jeg føler mig alene, men det er jeg ikke.
Jeg har en mørk skygge efter mig, lige meget hvor jeg er.
Skyggen får mig til, at græde selv på mine gode dage.
Skyggen gør mig bange og den får mig til, at føle mig tryg,
den gør mig ked af det og den får mig til at føle, at jeg ikke er alene,
alt sammen på samme tid.

Jeg mødte denne skygge for nogle år siden, og nogle gange føleles det som om, det er alt hvad jeg har.
Men jeg ved, at jeg har meget mere end den åndsvage skygge.
Og at jeg ikke har brug for den.

Men jeg kan ikke slippe af med de.
Lige meget hvor meget jeg prøver.

Den er der når jeg lukker mine øjne.
Den er der når jeg er sammen med mine venner.
Den er der når jeg spiser aftensmad.
Den er der, lige meget hvad jeg laver.”

“I feel alone, but i’m not.
I have a dark shadow following me, no matter where i go. 
The shadow makes me cry, even on my happiest days.
The shadow makes me scared and makes me feel safe,
it makes me sad and it makes me feel like i’m not alone,
all on the same time.
I met this shadow years ago, and sometimes it feels like it’s all i have.
But i know i have way more than that stupid shadow.
And that i know i don’t need it.

But i can’t get rid of it.
No matter how hard i try, i just can’t.

It’s there when i close my eyes.
It’s there when i’m with my friends.
It’s there when i’m eating dinner.
It’s there, no matter what i’m doing.”

// Sarah Katrine
Instagram – sarahkatrinekat
Mail – Sarahkatblog@gmail.com

GLÆDELIG 2. SØNDAG I ADVENT.

Jeg er en af mange, som ikke kan gå en dag uden musik i ørerne eller en dag uden, at synge.
Jeg har mange ynglings sange – Men her kan I se ti sange som jeg altid kan lytte til, uden at blive træt af dem.

1. ED SHEERAN – I’M A MESS (X ACOUSTIC SESSION)
2. ANDY GRAMMER – FRESH EYES
3. THE BEATLES – BLACKBIRD (REHEARSAL TAKE)
4. ANOUK – LOST
5. MADS LANGER – FACT FICTION
6. SAM SPARRO – BLACK AND GOLD
7. NE-YO – SO SICK
8. IMAN OMARI – TAKE YOU THERE
9. AMY WINEHOUSE – VALERIE
10. RONAN KEATING – IF TOMORROW NEVER COMES

Disse sange er sange som jeg aldrig bliver træt af og kan teksten på 100%
Nogle er ældre end andre – Men de er altså alle på min top 10.
Nu kender I lidt til min musik smag.

Jeg håber, at I alle nyder dage.

// Sarah Katrine

Instagram – Sarahkatrinekat
Mail – sarahkatblog@gmail.com